Demise and Rebirth
by tokyoghoulobsession
Summary: After the terrible destruction of Anteiku by the CCG's cruel assault, Kaneki comes back as a ghoul investigator named Haise Sasaki. Suffering from memory loss, he must find his place in the world again. His return could save everyone or destroy everything. Which will it be...? *Please do not read unless you have read all of Tokyo Ghoul and up to Tokyo Ghoul:re 5*
1. Kaneki is Back! Chapter 1

How long ago was it… when everything fell apart? Did it start when I met Rize-san? No… It was long before that. The shattered pieces of myself fell around me until there was nothing left, but darkness and despair masked by anger driven towards no one in particular. Deep down in the abyss a part of me hated everyone, but it wasn't their fault. No, it was mine-_**mine-mine-MINE**__**..**_ It's all my fault, my choices, my actions, my mistakes… I made so many mistakes. Still I don't want to die yet, I have things I need to do. I need to save the Manager. I need to tell Hide that I'm a- I already did, but when? Where? How? What? Why? Why? Why? Why did I tell him? Wait, I remember now… He saw me and I ate him. I stuffed my mouth with his guts. He told me to fight, so I did and I died too. But why did I eat him, I didn't want to, I swear I didn't. I didn't want to eat Hide. Hide, Hide, Hide, HIDE! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. It was my fault, my fault, my fault. I'm sorry.

I'm still sleeping. It's so peaceful down here, in my own sub consciousness. I can run away from my mistakes. They can't find me here. It's so peaceful and… lonely. When was the last time I had a cup of the manager's coffee? It always tasted so good, almost as good as Hide- wait, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I didn't do that. I didn't eat Hide. It wasn't me, I swear it wasn't me. It wasn't me. Leave me alone. Alone! Alone! Why… why did this happen to us? Why are we so ugly? Am I half dead yet? Why am I smiling in the dark? Where is everyone? Did they die? Touka, Yomo-san, Manager, everyone… Are you dead? Dead inside like me? Please don't be like me. Why am I crying in the dark? All the light is gone. Hide is gone. Yoshimura-san is gone. Touka is gone. Nishki-san is gone. Hinami is gone. Where did you all go? Please don't leave me… I don't want to be alone. Hide… I can't stop crying. Would you please smile for me one last time? Just once more… Please?

Light? There's a light. I'm walking, I'm running towards it. I can see the light. I'm close, so very close. I need to jump. Hurry, Hurry, Hurry, Hurry. I need to escape this, this tragedy! Touka, Hide, wait for me. I'm almost there!

**{Back to the material world…}**

Touka looked through the holes of her rabbit mask. "Ka..neki…?" The word seemed foreign in her mouth, like she hadn't said it in a long time. The name of her friend, but he was lost. Long, long ago. Touka knew he would come back, but it had been so long. "Kaneki, KANEKI!" What the hell? Why was he with the ghoul investigators? The lone female had caught the attention of the half ghoul.

"Rabbit. Stay stationed here! She is dangerous. Wait for my signal!" Sasaki climbed up quickly to the roof top where Touka was stationed. "Rabbit, you have killed so many investigators, but if you come without a fight you will not be harmed!" Sasaki took a hold of the quinque that was always at his side. Acting like a hero, about to capture a dangerous criminal, he waited for her reply, but he felt something wrong in his chest. Why did he feel like he knew her? His head was pounding as if something was on the inside trying to get out. Sasaki felt so damn sleepy, but he couldn't fall asleep now.

"Rabbit-? What the hell are you talking about Kaneki?! You aren't a shitty ghoul investigator! Kaneki! Don't you remember me?!" Under the rabbit mask, tears pricked her eyes. Everyone had split up after Anteiku was demolished by those damned ghoul investigators. "Pull you head out of your ass Kaneki!" She was practically screaming at him. He didn't even remember her? "Kaneki!" The cool texture of water fell down her cheeks. Touka felt that this was the only way to make him remember her. She removed the mask, exploiting her whole face to the ghoul investigator. "Did we all mean so little to you that you could forget about Anteiku that easily, you stupid bastard?! Wake up Kaneki! It's me Touka!"

The pain was head-splitting. "Ugh-" The lone ghoul investigator fell to the floor and clutched his head. What- why was this happening?! Then Sasaki saw it; the black figure that stood over him at all times. _Touka! Touka! _ It was screaming for her. It stretched out of his back. It kept calling her name. Wait, why had the ghoul removed her mask? He was a ghoul investigator and her identity would be found out. _No you're not! _What? _You're her friend! We're her friend! Touka, Touka! I'm here! I'm right here!_ Touka…? Was that this girl not much older than him?

"We all need your help! The Manager he- he is…" More tears welled up in her eyes. Yomo-san had received news that Yoshimura was still alive, but it was only a matter of time before… and there was nothing she could do for him alone. "Please… We need your help!" Touka could barely find her voice. "He is going to die if we do nothing! Please, if you don't remember me at least remember Anteiku and the Manager!" Her knees felt weak. She felt like a little girl again. "Please… he is going to die…" Those words left her mouth in only a whisper. Her throat was sore from all the yelling she had just done. Kaneki… Just what the hell happened to you? She asked herself that question over and over again.

_Remember! You need to remember! _ The figure screeched at him. _Remember! Remember! Remember!_ Its white hands with black fingernails clutched his hair. The grip was so powerful. Just about when his skull was going to crack under the pressure those lean white fingers eased into his head. The pain- oh the pain! He had never felt anything like it before. _Remember!_ Pictures flashed before his eyes, memories he had forgotten about. How could he have forgotten? They were so important. The Manager smiling at him, Touka yelling at him, Hide embracing him. How could he have forgotten? Nishki clutching his arm for support, Hinami asking him for help, Rize-san walking with him to the bookstore. Suddenly he was no longer on the floor of the top of the building with Touka. He was in a white place with no wind or sound or darkness. The dark slim figure looked back at him; a mirror reflection, but with snow white hair and a small smile. Next to him stood another person he had not seen before. His jet black hair was a bit shorter than the other person's and he wore a coffee shop uniform. "Are you ready to go back?" The black haired boy inquired with a kind smile.

"Back to where?" Sasaki couldn't get a grip on what was happening, but these two boys where in his restored memories.

"Anteiku of course! They need you." The black haired boy with the eye patch laughed politely at the question. "I'm already long gone. I can't go, I'm too weak." A sad smile moved onto his face. Pieces of the black haired boy floated into the air and dispersed slowly. "I'll leave the decision up to you guys." His body soon turned transparent and disappeared.

They were alone again.

"What are you going to do Sasaki? Are you going to let me back in again? It is my body after all and you are just a new resident replacing the old me." The snow white haired man said those words, but none of them made any sense to Sasaki.

Sasaki was distracted by the gleam of a glossy black arachnid hidden in the checkered floor. A centipede. The insect crawled onto the snow white boy and onto his arm. "Sasaki…" The boy walked right up to the ghoul investigator's face with the centipede. Its shiny black body integrated into Sasaki's forehead. A cruel smirk found its way onto Kaneki's face. "Sleep for a bit. It's my turn."

Sasaki couldn't speak as the centipede nested between his eyes. He started to sink, lower and lower into the floor. Just before Sasaki sunk below the surface he saw something familiar; the white haired boy cracked his index finger with his thumb. A single word found his lips. "Kaneki…?" The darkness surrounded him and the ghoul investigator fell into a deep sleep. He kept falling deeper and deeper into the abyss…

**{Back to the material world…}**

Touka was looking at Kaneki as he screeched and clawed at the floor. "Give it back it's mine. Mine... Mine... Mine..."A kagune erupted from his pale back. Touka watched with fascination and a certain fear. The black hair that had accumulated over the years was slowly replaced by the snow white color that the boy used to have. "I'm so... hungry." The noises that followed that sentence where both inhumane and insane. A mask dissolved from the air covered his warped smile. It was a centipede. His bloodshot gaze locked onto Touka who was still slumped to the floor and in too much awe to say anything to the insane ghoul. "Let me have a bite." In less than a second, his jaws locked onto Touka's shoulder; oblivious to whom he was trying to eat.

"Agh-" Touka clenched her teeth together in an effort to hold in the scream. Her shoulder popped and snapped under the pressure of the ghoul's teeth. "Kaneki…" The calmness in her voice made the boy stop for a moment. She smacked the side of his face with her hand so hard that the sound echoed throughout the sky. "Get it together, idiot."

He released her shoulder from his grip. Slowly the realization came to him that he had just tried to eat one of his best friends. Both his hands clutched his watery eyes as he spoke again. "Touka-chan… I'm sorry. I'm so sorry…" The white haired boy let the tears stream down his face as the centipede mask dispersed into the air.

Touka's other hand went to grip her bitten shoulder. Blood oozed out of it slowly and it hurt terribly. Soon he regained the strength and to stand up and he helped her up too. Kaneki took off the annoying jacket and tie so that he was left with a simple white button-up T shirt. His gaze shifted down to the flock of investigators waiting for their leader to come back. He jumped down from the building and smiled as his kagune ripped apart the ghoul investigators. Their screams of terror only made him kill them faster. Soon after the butchering was done, he went to feast on the meat left behind. Touka jumped down from the building after the ghoul was done, but she fell to one knee when she reached the ground. Every movement made her shoulder throb even though it had started healing already. "I'm sorry about that Touka-chan." Kaneki said as he helped her up again.

"It's alright." She said, forcing herself to ignore the pain. "Let's go." Touka took his wrist and led him down the alley way towards some place that was unfamiliar to him.

"Touka-chan, where are we going?"

"We are going to my apartment. After Anteiku was destroyed, I moved to another apartment building, but I…" Touka made a fist with her free hand. "I couldn't leave the 20th ward."

He looked at her with genuine concern. How much had changed while he was gone? "Touka-chan, back there you said something about the manager… Where is he?"

"Yomo-san had heard rumors of the manager, so he decided to check it out. The truth was that the One-eyed Owl had been using him for human experiments, but…" Her voice trailed off. "He is in some sort of coma. They'll keep him alive for more experiments, but when they are finished Yoshimura-san will be tossed aside like some kind of broken toy. Yomo-san knows where they are. Kaneki we need your help. All that's left is me and Yomo-san. I don't want Anteiku to be over."


	2. Rize's Return? Chapter 2

Kaneki listened to her quietly, trying to clearly understand how many people had survived the strike on Anteiku by the CCG. Touka was oblivious to the truth that the One-eyed Owl was Yoshimura's child, and he decided for some reason to keep it from her. It was better to keep things uncomplicated. Besides, even if that monster was Yoshimura's only child, Kaneki was still bent on killing that beast. While the One-eyed Owl was still breathing, no one could live undisturbed and for that reason he would slaughter the only family the Manager had left. "Touka-chan, I know a few ghouls that can help us get Yoshimura-san back. Banjo-san is still around, isn't he? Do you know where Hinami is too?"

"Banjo is still around here, but Hinami… A while back she joined Aogiri Tree. I don't know what she was thinking, but there was no one left to take care of her. Yoshimura-san was gone, bother her parents are gone too, and then you disappeared. I was too busy to notice that she was drifting farther and farther away. Damn it…" Touka clenched her teeth and made a fist again. "Because I failed to notice, she joined up with that scum! I'm so pissed off…" Touka stayed quiet for a moment. "You know… She stopped calling me 'big sis'." Touka's voice cracked slightly when she said that, almost as if saying it had made it a reality. She had everything taken away from her again. A loving home, a father figure, and a younger sibling; her past kept repeating it seemed. "I fucking hate this Kaneki… I want them all to come back home, but there is no home anymore!"

Kaneki took her hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. "Don't worry Touka, I'll save the Manager. I won't let anyone else be killed. I promise." Kaneki walked with her silently the rest of the way to the apartment building. _Don't make a promise you can't keep._ A single doubting thought wandered out from his sub consciousness. Kaneki had failed miserably the last time he had tried to save the manager, but he would not allow that to happen again. The white haired boy would destroy anyone in the way of his objective. Kaneki convinced himself that he needed to kill the One-eyed Owl and save Yoshimura-san. Their footsteps echoed off the walls of the alley way, all the while thoughts ran through his head like the spike Arima had penetrated Kaneki with in the past. 

_**What will Yoshimura-san think when you kill his child?**_

_**Is that really okay?**_

_**Will the Manager ever forgive you?**_

_**What will you do after?**_

_**How many will die in the process?**_

_**Can the One-eyed Owl really be killed by you?**_

_**Can you protect everyone?**_

_**You can't protect anyone.**_

_Shut up. _Kaneki continued walking without a single answer to any of those questions. He focused on the quiet noises of the night; a horn honking, an owl's powerful wing beat, to drive away the questions he could not answer…

**{At CCG HQ}**

"What did you say?" Itsuki Marude exclaimed and his shrill, agitated voice seemed to radiate throughout the whole building. "Squad 17.D was wiped out?! Did you lose your mind on your way here!" Marude grabbed the poor messenger's tie and tugged harshly. "Haise Sasaki was with them, do you really think he was wiped out that easily after we spent almost our entire budget on him?! Huh?!" The messenger tried to calm down the raging superior, but to no avail.

"Actually Sir-"

"Huh? What is it?! Speak up!"

"Rank 1 Haise Sasaki was the one that wiped out the squad!" The lower investigator yelled over Marude's voice and the entire room heard it. Marude was taken back for a moment.

"Hey, are you serious?" Frightened murmurs soon followed the profound statement.

Inside the board room was the shinigami himself, Arima. He was too occupied drinking tea to even comment on the elephant in the room. An ominous presence soon made itself known and the ghoul investigator raised his gaze. Marude and Arima's gazes locked onto each other. Arima was as calm as could be, while Marude was about to be pushed over the cliff. "Arima!" The investigator marched right up to the protégé. "This was your damn idea, so you fix it!"

He took a moment to reply. "I would sir but, it's my vacation."

"Huh?" Marude had had it. He was _pushed over_ his limit. "What vacation?!"

Arima looked at the agitated ghoul investigator. "Have you forgotten? Every two years an investigator is able to take a 42 day vacation if they have worked diligently throughout those two years. A year ago you went to Hawaii, remember?"

Marude was completely distracted by the thought of those warm sunny beaches and beautiful Hawaiian women to hear the rest of Arima's explanation of the timely vacation, but soon his mind was thrown back to reality. "Tch- AKIRA!"

The lone female investigator watched her superior try to hold in his irritation. Marude's eyes became dark as he issued his orders to her. "Find the little squirt with special forces squad 13.A. If he is still Sasaki, bring him in. If not, eliminate him on the spot. If the SS ghoul 'Centipede' comes back, it'll be hell for all of us."

**{At Touka's Apartment}**

Touka ran the hot water over her face. Her hands moved across the skin; cleaning the blood off her shoulder from where Kaneki had bitten her. The shower doors where slightly blurred from the steam and her finger drew a rabbit on the foggy door. It was clear for a moment then it blurred and blurred again until there was nothing left but a faint outline. Touka stared at that space for what seemed like forever. She hadn't fought with everyone; she had run away like a craven and a child. She faded into the crowd just like how the drawing faded back into the steam; leaving only an outline. Yomo-san had told her that there was no other way; to not waist everyone's sacrifice, but what was it worth to save a child like her? Maybe if Yomo and she had joined the fight, everyone would still be here. Is the Manager even still alive? That news was delivered on the waves of rumors; only rumors. Yet she so desperately wanted it to be true. Touka continued to take a shower while Kaneki was slouched lifelessly on the couch.

_I bit her. I tried to eat her. Don't use a power you can't control. Don't use it, and everyone will be safer; much, much safer. _ His eyes stared into the white carpet without any interest. It had been the same from when he had hurt Banjo-san. "God damn it-"

"Hey, hey now. Isn't it rude to curse in front of a lady Kaneki~?"

His eyes widened and focused on the pair of feet that had moved in front of him. _That voice- No-no way. There's no way._ He slowly looked up at the face of the familiar female.

Rize stared right back at him. "Hello Kaneki-kun~" Her smile sent chills down his spine. "You're starting to look even more delicious."

"Rize-san…" Her eyes where filled with mischief. A black leather jacket hung loosely around her shoulders and dark denim jeans covered her legs. A black and blue shirt was concealed under the jacket and instead of glasses, a pair of motorcycle goggles rested on her forehead. Her hair had gotten longer and her hand was holding a biker helmet with an iron spike on top. "You've changed."

"Hm, I had to. After our little date, the doves found 'Rize Kamishiro' and she had to disappear, but I'm back now Kaneki… Do you want to take me on a date again? I promise it'll be so much more fun than the last one…" Her playful smirk waited to see his reaction, but before she could see it, Yomo-san intervened.

"Rize. Stop it now." His voice was stern with warning and his eyes gleamed with hostility.

"Yomo-san…" Kaneki was still speechless from the appearance of the missing Rize.

Soon after, Touka walked out of her room; dressed in a hoodie and lose sweatpants. She looked at the three of them. "Rize… What the fuck are you doing in here again?!"

"Yomo-kun game me a key." She replied; not amused by Touka's burst of rage.

Touka's irritated gaze shifted to Yomo. "It doesn't really matter, right? You'd bust down the door to get in anyways."

Rize held in a giggle and smiled. "Touka, you know me all too well."

Yomo took a seat in a chair. His face held something different than it did before; grief, but at the same time a stubbornness. "We are all here to discuss the rumors flying around about Yoshimura-san. I investigated and…" The tension in the air was unreal. Touka dug her nails into the flesh of her pale arm. "It's true. The manager is alive, but he is being held captive by Aogiri Tree."

"How do you know?" Kaneki's voice cracked. He didn't want to fill anyone with doubt, but he needed to know how Yomo got this information.

Yomo looked at Kaneki with eyes that seemed full of understanding. "Hinami told me."

Blood ran cold in Touka. The same Hinami who had abandoned Anteiku, who had left Touka in the dark, was now trying to help them. No. No way. There's no way.

"Touka…" Kaneki watched her expression change from shock to anger to disbelief. He knew how hard this must have been for her.

"No way…" She mumbled to herself. "There's no way! Why would she help us after everything she did?! I can't believe it! I won't…"

**Author's Little Note**: I am so glad I getting so many good reviews on this story even though it is my first fanfiction! I have been dead tired and incredibly am busy for the past while. I plan on writing more soon so please be patient with me!


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